If looks could employ…

            This lesbian is wearing makeup.  There’s a job fair this morning and my partner made it clear that I am expected to attend.  I know it will be a waste of time with dozens of $10 an hour jobs but those around me have run out of patience with my job search process.  Not that I blame them.  I’ve been indecisive.  Sometimes the thought of going back into higher education is enough to stir the battery acid that resides in the pit of my stomach and the anxiety spreads upward until I can taste it.  But the non-profit sector jobs I’ve interviewed for don’t have the salary and benefits afforded in the education and corporate sector.  Some days I apply only for event management jobs.  Certain that I cannot see myself doing anything else.  Some days, I’m determined to get back to my roots and do technical writing. 

            The time off hasn’t really renewed my passion for work.  Instead it has shown me that there is a whole class of people found mid-morning at coffee shops and grocery stores and movie theatres.  Now I am among them and I just don’t want to give it up yet.   But finances require more than that of me. I should have settled on the coffee-shop life prior to bringing two beautiful little drains on society into the world.  I’ve even considered making one of those little mooches earn his keep.  Maybe Riley could land a modeling or acting job because he’s the most precocious and adorable kid ever to exist..  But that doesn’t seem to be the most realistic business plan either. 

            So this lesbian put on her slacks and business jacket.  Slipped into those blocky healed brown monsters that are the closest thing I have to dress shoes and yes even applied make up.  Maybe today will be my day.  If looks could employ, I’d be hired for sure. 

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2 Responses to “If looks could employ…”

  1. Chicory Says:

    wow, I so resonated with this post. The months-long job search surrounded by plenty of jobs you COULD take, but none of which would actually provide what you need…

    good luck!

  2. David Says:

    Oh, Ruth… I was hoping we could be unemployed together and now you are going to go ruin it all by getting a job.

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