Tired of breathing air I can see

I’m stuck in the midst of the January blues.

It isn’t helping that we’re breathing air soup right now. The inversion is so bad (and has been for a week) that children are being kept in for recess. You can imagine the energy at our house at night since the boys haven’t gotten it out in the day. Enduring January in Salt Lake City has gotten me longing for and dreaming about law school next year. Where will we live? What will the climate be like? Will I be able to breathe the air? What will we do if Kim doesn’t get a job? Or doesn’t get finished? I think Phoenix would be nice. Or Tucson. But lets be honest, Kim has applied for jobs in Michigan and Pennsylvania, Iowa, Connecticut, and North Carolina. She’s also applied for Texas, but she’s gotten that rejection already.

If I do end up in Tucson, I need someone reliable to remind me in the middle of July that I ASKED FOR IT. But in January, it will all be worth it.

So far I have a full-ride scholarship to a tier 3 school and a tier 2 school and no scholarship money to any of my tier 1s. I guess I’m inclined to want to do the lower ranked school on scholarship. After all, I’m going to be forty before I’m done and I’m not looking for a shot at BigLaw. The uncertainty is on my mind all the time. It is on all of our minds. Riley is particularly worried about change. He loves his school and his friends and seeing his auntie and nana/papa about once a month.

In truth, I’m scared as hell to move, to start law school, to figure out our lives as “professor Kim and partner”.  But I’m also sick and tired of trying to get warm while breathing air I can see.


7 Responses to “Tired of breathing air I can see”

  1. Kaye Says:

    I hate Phoenix. Tucson is beautiful regardless of the time of year. Pennsylvania is awesome, and really doesn’t get THAT cold. I have a friend who was 39 when she started law school. She’s been done for about a year now, and loves it. Small firm, decent pay, but finally doing the thing that she always wanted to do. It’s worth it. She went to Washburn (tier whatever), and has stayed in Kansas….

  2. Kaye Says:

    Oops – what I really wanted to say is that regardless of where you go, I hope that you keep blogging. You always manage to make me laugh or think…

  3. dad Says:

    In life only one thing is guaranteed. Change.

  4. Keri Says:

    Leave it to your dad to say something logical. I suppose I can agree with that but it doesn’t make it easier. I’d hate to see you all leave but not as much as I’d love to see you all go – and live somewhere that values your family … with air you can’t see. It’s hard. Mostly I just want all of us to live somewhere (all together) where everything is wonderful.
    THAT is the “change” that works easiest for me. 🙂

  5. kim Says:

    ditto – to keri…

  6. kelly Says:

    i love you all and want to see you happy, healthy, safe, and loving life… my list of demands also includes you being closer… i mean, you will be happy and you will all adjust no matter where you are because you have each other, and you are like magnets; any and all good natured queers will be knocking down your door.

    the decisions are tough, but you will get through them all with the finesse that you conquer everything with.


  7. Chicory Says:

    I’m going to miss you all so much!

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